Affirmations For Loved Ones

I grabbed these comments from one of my favorite books when I was a medical massage therapist in Las Vegas. It's titled A Headache In The Pelvis: A new understanding and treatment for chronic pelvic pain syndromes, by David Wise, Ph.D., and Rodney Anderson, M.D. This is such an outstanding book that I'm sure I'll be quoting more from it in the future!

"I want to be present with you exactly as you are. I am not asking you to change in any way. While I may have preferences about how I might want you to be, I am committed to letting go of those preferences in favor of letting you be exactly the way you are. You may change from one moment to the next, and I am committed to being fully present with you on a moment-to-moment basis and to feel and accept you however much you change. No matter what happens in this moment, I am determined to let you be as you are with an open and sincere heart."

Kristopher 

Thoughts On Love And Living

The older I get, the more I cherish life.

I thought I would share an article I found several years ago. The article below is from the prologue of the book, Reflections - Thoughts on Love and Living by Ginger Hutton. Sorry to get all sappy, but I love articles like this. (What's the real reason I post articles like this? Motivation!)

Don’t bring me flowers, whatnots or jewelry.

Give me a fresh idea. One that I can roll around in my mind and on my tongue and savor for months to come. Human beings are vessels waiting to be filled with knowledge. I always feel half empty.

Give me a book. If it says something I don’t agree with – if it shakes me up – if it makes me spend hours thinking it through, so much better. I need the mental exercise.

Give me days to watch people, to listen to them, to understand them, so that their differences become familiar to me and no longer divide us.

Give me conversations with people who know more than I do, who teach me to think on a grander scale than I have before, who leave my mind racing and my dreams soaring.

Give me a job that seems a bit beyond me so that it makes me stretch to conquer my limitations and discover strengths I didn’t know I had.

Give me something new to taste, something new to see, something new to try, something new to feel.

Give me a workshop, a seminar, a lecture, a documentary, a movie, a class, a magazine, a newspaper. There are so many things to read, so many places to go, so many things to experience and not enough time to do it all.

Give me time. 

Give me freedom from all those things that take our energy and give back little. Heaven would be a place free of all the physical upkeep, like house-keeping and car repair, that is necessary to maintain this world.

Give me freedom from guilt when I take an hour or two from what I’m ‘supposed to do’ to read. So many of the supposed-to-dos will be undone or forgotten within moments or days. Learning stays with you forever.

Give me more moments talking and playing with children, mine and others. They teach me to feel and to express more openly and honestly.

Give me times of pain as well as gladness, for they develop inner strength and build faith in my ability to successfully deal with life’s mixed offerings.

Give me my mistakes, for they make me less judgmental of others.

Give me an answer.

Give me a question for which there appears to be no answer.

Kristopher 

Attachment

I gathered the information for this post from my Aikido sensei and wrote it when I was still living in Las Vegas performing massage therapy and EFT Tapping. One can just as well use the lessons in this post for the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona. I know I'm using this sagely advice! 

Concerning the Wim Hof Method, massage or EFT Tapping, just like most anything else, there is body action of some kind. Of course, that has to be. I must raise my arms and place my hands and fingers on the client’s face and body to tap on the meridian points or perform massage while I teach the client how to do it themselves. But what is my body action an expression of? That's the question.

Is it an expression of my own small mind, trying to do something? Or is it an expression of the deeper sense of unity? Is it creating goodness out of badness, when a client is stressed out, or in a weakened condition, or injured? Do I think that there is something wrong, and I need to fix it?

This is seeing only the relative world. This is seeing only chaos, where in fact there is perfect order. If I don't see the order, then the order does not influence the client using EFT Tapping, massage, or anything else.

The client cannot see the order, balance, harmonious universe, because of their temporary condition of stress, anxiety, physical pain, etc. If I don't see perfection, then the client also doesn't see that.

When someone feels pain, there is attachment to that area of the mind/body. So, one might think that, if you are attached, in some sense your mind is strong there. But it is just very stuck there.

Attachment is weakness. If my mind is strong, it is free and not stuck. Mind is weak there in that sore place or injured place, so if I touch the client using EFT Tapping there in that sore or injured place with a free mind, then I can release the attachment.

So the nature of what transpires between us, the client and me, the quality or flavor of what transpires between us, carries the quality, flavor, or taste of the source of that. If it comes from my small mind, then it carries that flavor; that characteristic. It is not that it is nothing, in this case, but it's limited. It's not limitless. It is not infinite. It's finite.

So what is the point of all that?

It is very important for me, and clients, to begin to truly understand how it is that energy pervades everything. It is everything there is. So, if I think, "I am going to move energy from me to you", or attempt to channel or move energy from The Great Spirit, or Heaven or God or whatever to you, this is limited thinking and a bit of a mistake.

Because how can that happen? It's already there.

Curtis Sensei lecture.

Kristopher 

Death Awareness

Death Awareness comments by the author Carlos Castaneda in a conversation with don Juan Matus, a character in one of his books. 

"A warrior thinks of his death when things become unclear."  

"That's even harder, don Juan. For most people death is very vague and remote.  We never think of it."  

"Why not?"  

"Why should we?"  

"Very simple," he said.  "Because the idea of death is the only thing that tempers our spirit."  

"By the time knowledge becomes a frightening affair the man also realizes that death is the irreplaceable partner that sits next to him on the mat.  Every bit of knowledge that becomes power has death as its central force.  Death lends the ultimate touch, and whatever is touched by death indeed becomes power.  

"A man who follows the paths of sorcery is confronted with imminent annihilation every turn of the way, and unavoidably he becomes keenly aware of his death.  Without the awareness of death he would be only an ordinary man involved in ordinary acts.  He would lack the necessary potency, the necessary concentration that transforms one's ordinary time on earth into magical power.”  

"Thus to be a warrior a man has to be, first of all, and rightfully so, keenly aware of his own death.  But to be concerned with death would force any one of us to focus on the self and that would be debilitating.  So the next thing one needs to be a warrior is detachment.  The idea of imminent death, instead of becoming an obsession, becomes an indifference."  

Don Juan stopped talking and looked at me.  He seemed to be waiting for a comment.  

"Do you understand?" he asked.  

I understood what he had said but I personally could not see how anyone could arrive at a sense of detachment.  I said that from the point of view of my own apprenticeship I had already experienced the moment when knowledge became such a frightening affair.  I could also truthfully say that I no longer found support in the ordinary premises of my daily life.  And I wanted, or perhaps even more than wanted, I needed, to live like a warrior.  

"Now you must detach yourself," he said.  

"From what?"  

"Detach yourself from everything."  

"That's impossible.  I don't want to be a hermit."  

"To be a hermit is an indulgence and I never meant that.  A hermit is not detached, for he willfully abandons himself to being a hermit.  

"Only the idea of death makes a man sufficiently detached so he is incapable of abandoning himself to anything.  Only the idea of death makes a man sufficiently detached so he can't deny himself anything.  A man of that sort, however, does not crave, for he has acquired a silent lust for life and for all things of life.  He knows his death is stalking him and won't give him time to cling to anything, so he tries, without craving, all of everything.  

"A detached man, who knows he has no possibility of fencing off his death, has only one thing to back himself with: the power of his decisions.  He has to be, so to speak, the master of his choices.  He must fully understand that his choice is his responsibility and once he makes it there is no longer time for regrets or recriminations.  His decisions are final, simply because his death does not permit him time to cling to anything.  

"And thus with an awareness of his death, with his detachment, and with the power of his decisions a warrior sets his life in a strategical manner.  The knowledge of his death guides him and makes him detached and silently lusty; the power of his final decisions makes him able to choose without regrets and what he chooses is always strategically the best; and so he performs everything he has to with gusto and lusty efficiency. 

"When a man behaves in such a manner one may rightfully say that he is a warrior and has acquired patience!"  

"When a warrior has acquired patience he is on his way to will.  He knows how to wait.  His death sits with him on his mat, they are friends.  His death advises him, in mysterious ways, how to choose, how to live strategically.  And the warrior waits!  I would say that the warrior learns without any hurry because he knows he is waiting for his will; and one day he succeeds in performing something ordinarily quite impossible to accomplish. 

He may not even notice his extraordinary deed.  But as he keeps on performing impossible acts, or as impossible things keep on happening to him, he becomes aware that a sort of power is emerging.  A power that conies out of his body as he progresses on the path of knowledge.  At first it is like an itching on the belly, or a warm spot that cannot be soothed; then it becomes a pain, a great discomfort.  Sometimes the pain and discomfort are so great that the warrior has convulsions for months, the more severe the convulsions the better for him. A fine power is always heralded by great pain.  

"Death is the only wise adviser that we have.  Whenever you feel, as you always do, that everything is going wrong and you're about to be annihilated, turn to your death and ask if that is so.  Your death will tell you that you're wrong; that nothing really matters outside its touch.  Your death will tell you, "I haven't touched you yet".  

"One of us here has to change, and fast.  One of us here has to learn again that death is the hunter, and that it is always to one's left.  One of us here has to ask death's advice and drop the cursed pettiness that belongs to men that live their lives as if death will never tap them."  

"You, on the other hand, feel that you are immortal, and the decisions of an immortal man can be cancelled or regretted or doubted. In a world where death is the hunter, my friend, there is no time for regrets or doubts.  There is only time for decisions."  

"It doesn't matter what the decision is," he said.  "Nothing could be more or less serious than anything else.  Don't you see?  In a world where death is the hunter there are no small or big decisions.  There are only decisions that we make in the face of our inevitable death."  

"You always feel compelled to explain your acts, as if you were the only man on earth who's wrong," he said.  "It's your old feeling of importance.  You have too much of it; you also have too much personal history.  On the other hand, you don't assume responsibility for your acts; you're not using your death as an adviser, and above all, you are too accessible.  In other words, your life is as messy as it was before I met you."  

"Use it. Focus your attention on the link between you and your death, without remorse or sadness or worrying.  Focus your attention on the fact you don't have time and let your acts flow accordingly.  Let each of your acts be your last battle on earth.  Only under those conditions will your acts have their rightful power.  Otherwise they will be, for as long as you live, the acts of a timid man."  

"What an exquisite omen this is!" he went on.  "And all for you.  Power is showing you that death is the indispensable ingredient in having to believe.  Without the awareness of death everything is ordinary, trivial.  It is only because death is stalking us that the world is an unfathomable mystery.  Power has shown you that.  All I have done myself is to round up the details of the omen, so the direction would be clear to you; but in rounding up the details, I have also shown you that everything I have said to you today is what I have to believe myself, because that is the predilection of my spirit."

To be continued...

Kristopher 

The Warrior's Last Stand

Usually, when we think of a ‘warrior,’ someone drawing a line in the sand, making their last stand on earth, we think they are committing themselves to an all-or-nothing battle: here and now, on this spot, live or die. That's the kind of ultimatum many others often describe. They make it sound like a fight, like, put up your dukes, but it's really not.

It's the end of fighting, the end of a lifelong struggle.

Did that comment lose you? Read on.

Drawing this line doesn't mean battle stations, red alert, DEFCOM one and all that. It’s not that kind of battle. It means we have to lower our shields, not raise them. That's how easily and effectively we are undone, and it's because the enemy is within, running the show, redeploying all of our mental and emotional resources against us.

Instead of adopting a warlike posture, we must, counter-intuitively, lower our shields and defenses. This seems confusing until we understand that we are both the protagonist and the antagonist in this conflict, both attacker and defender.

This is the paradoxical nature of the struggle. We can't win by fighting. The very thing that fights, that resists, is the thing we seek to overthrow. Only by vanquishing self-importance can we prevail.

Only in surrender can we find victory. This is the part so few get, and fewer get beyond.

This is the part where everything starts sounding all sagely or Zen like, but that can't be helped. If you want to say that all religions and spiritual teachings share a core truth, it can only be this: Surrender is victory.

Yet, this isn’t the end. It’s only the beginning.

Once we surrender, The Real Work begins.

Death Is An Advisor - Memento Mori

"Perhaps the whole root of our trouble, the human trouble, is that we will sacrifice all the beauty of our lives, will imprison ourselves in totems, taboos, crosses, blood sacrifices, steeples, mosques, races, armies, flags, nations, in order to deny the fact of death, which is the only fact we have." ~ James Baldwin

Death is the key to life. Death defines life, gives it shape and meaning and context. Without a clear and honest relationship with our mortality, we live in a state of endless spiritual sprawl, a soupy gray fog that creates that hellish illusion of life stretching endlessly in all directions.

We’ve homogenized our lives by hiding the parts we’re afraid of, and in so doing, we’ve removed all sense of urgency from life. We have taken death out of life and that allows us to live unconsciously. Death never left, of course, we’ve just turned away from it, pretended it wasn’t there. If we wish to awaken - and that’s a mighty big if - then we must welcome death back into our lives. Death is our own personal Zen Master, our source of power, our path to lucidity, but we have to stop running from it in a blind panic.

We need only stop and turn around and there it is, inches away, staring at us with unblinking gaze, finger poised, every second of our lives. That finger is the one true thing in the dream-state, and it will, for a fact, come down.

Death-awareness is the universal spiritual practice. What we have sought in books and magazines, in teachers and teachings, in ancient cultures and foreign lands, has been breathing down our neck the entire time. It’s not just another mood-making spiritual technique that you dabble with for a few weeks and blame yourself when it doesn’t deliver. Death always delivers. Death is your only true friend, the only friend that will never abandon you and that no one can take away. It slices through every lie, ridicules every belief, mocks every vanity and reduces ego to absurdity. He’s sitting with you right now. If you want to know something, ask him. Death doesn’t lie.

The inverse of death-awareness is equally important.  Learn to practice death-denial awareness.  Anytime you find yourself sitting on the couch watching TV, shopping in the mall, or trying to find amusement in some pointless book or idle pastime, remind yourself that this is exactly the habit you want to break.  Try to catch yourself in all the situations throughout the day when you are not awake, not aware, going through the motions of your life in a virtually somnambulistic state.  Remind yourself constantly:  This moment, right now, I am in the sleep-state.  This is the mindlessness I’m addicted to like a drug.  I am an opium addict living in an opium dream.  This is the coma; this slow oozing of my life down the drain.  Right now, my life is slipping away.  

Another powerful thing about the practice and cultivation of death-awareness is that it provides an accurate barometer of your own spiritual sincerity, though you may not want one.  Anyone can go sour on mainstream religion and adopt a less orthodox belief system to replace it, but how many people are really sincere in their spiritual aspirations?  

Probably everyone thinks they are, but are YOU really?  Are you willing to go wherever this leads?  To do whatever it takes?  Thousands talk the talk for one who walks the walk.  The practice of death-awareness separates the walkers from the talkers.  We can use this as a spiritual self-diagnostic to determine, once and for all, if spirituality is something we’re serious about or if we’re just tourists.  Most are just tourists, but which of us are sincere and which are dabblers?  

If you want to answer this question for yourself, here’s your chance.  Your relationship to your own mortality tells the tale.  Everyone is either facing toward it or turned away from it, it’s that simple.  Toward or away.  If you can’t face the most fundamental fact of your own existence, what can you face?  This is ground floor, entry-level awakening.  It doesn’t get any closer or simpler than this.  

If, based on the posts in this thread, your life does not undergo major restructuring over the next few months, then you have your answer; you’re a tourist with no real desire or intent to wake up.  What you do with that knowledge is up to you.  Maybe you don’t want to know the answer to this question, but if you don’t want to know, then you know.

Kristopher 

Unbending Intent

When we have unbending intent to create something - that is, we deeply desire it, we completely believe that we can do it, and we are totally willing to have it - it simply cannot fail to manifest, and usually within a very short period of time. 

Think of when you started the WHM (Wim Hof Method.) Did you deeply desire it? Believe you can do it? Totally willing to receive the benefits of this training? This is what I've referring to when I mention 'unbending intent.' 

The clearer and stronger our unbending intent, the more quickly and easily our creative visualization will work. In any give situation we only need ask ourselves about the condition of our intent. If it is weak or uncertain, it can often be strengthened by affirming: I now have unbending intent to create this here and now!

We can think of life as containing three levels, and we can call those levels beingness, doingness, and havingness.

Beingness is the basic experience of being alive and conscious. It is the experience we have in deep meditation, the experience of being totally complete and at rest within oneself.

Doingness is movement and activity, it stems from the natural creative energy that flows through every living thing and is the source of our vitality.

Havingness is the state of being in relationship with other people and things in the universe. It is the ability to allow and accept things and people into our lives; to comfortably occupy the same space with them.

Beingness, doingness and havingness are like a triangle where each side supports the others. They are not in conflict with each other. They all exist simultaneously.

Often people attempt to live their lives backwards: They try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so that they will be happier.

The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.

Thus, the purpose is to connect us with our beingness to help us focus and facilitate our doingness and to increase and expand our havingness.

Kristopher 

The WHM Dojo Training Etiquette

Our training space, location or dare say I call it a 'WHM dojo,' but I will, is the place where we cleanse and enrich our mind/body. Such a place offers effective use only when it is filled with feelings of respect, gratitude, right attitude, and positive mutual support. 

When you come into your 'WHM dojo', or training location, you will notice that you and everyone you train with works very hard and sincerely to maintain these feelings listed above. Any feelings to the contrary should be left outside your WHM dojo. 

Following traditional forms of etiquette in your WHM dojo is an essential aspect of your training and should be practiced with sincerity. You will find, if you remain with the WHM for long, that "WHM Dojo Etiquette" is not a set list of rules and regulations to follow, but rather a Living Attitude. 

Just as discipline is a tool to use only until we learn to love the thing that is good for us, so the following list is a basis upon which to build our awareness of right thinking and right acting in relation to others. (I'm currently working on the list as I need to taper it to our training.) I'll get this done ASAP! :-) 

P.S. - I wrote this post in a rush and it's a mess. I've yet to write what I really mean...so, when I get the right words, I'll clean up this post. 

Kristopher

Eliminating Mind Chatter

What is internal mind chatter, or better known as, your internal dialogue? Most here are intimately familiar with it, but for those new to self help work, the internal dialogue is simply the mind-chatter that goes on in our heads at all times - the little voices that run lists, create inventories, make pronouncements (judgments, observations, questions), and in general "sing the world into being", as the Aborigines call it. Everything we experience is commented upon by the internal dialogue. "He's handsome," it observes. "Got to go to the post office today," it says, over and over, as if to remind us lest we could possibly forget. "Big tree." "Did you feed the fish?"

The problem with the internal dialogue is that it is what maintains your 'fixed attention' of the consensual reality. It keeps the agreements and strengthens them by never allowing you to examine your own I-Am from within the place of Silent Knowing. And that, of course, is why it is necessary to learn to stop the internal dialogue - to be able to actually find the awareness and attention point of the higher/core self which is otherwise drowned out by the chatter. What I have personally found to work best, at least for starters, is simply this:

1. Make a commitment to doing the exercise listed below for at least 30 minutes every night. If night time doesn't work for you, commit to the time of day when you are most "in touch" with your spirit.

2. Sit in silence and simply observe your inner thoughts. Do not attempt to analyze, categorize or stop the internal dialogue. Just listen to what it is saying. Do this for a minimum of 5-10 minutes, calmly accepting that this is the beginning, and that no attempt is being made to effect change at the present Now. You are simply observing & listening.

3. At a certain point, which may happen almost "in a flash", or might require several attempts to really observe, it will become aware to you that there are two "minds" at work. There is the self doing the speaking (the internal dialogue), and there is the self doing the observing. What you will further experience is that the "speaker" does not really like being watched, and once it realizes this is happening, it will almost seem to turn to you with an inquisitive gaze, rather like a dog caught whizzing on the floor. :-) Point is: it has just become aware that it is not alone, and just by virtue of being "caught in the act", there is a tendency for it to become more circumspect. It begins to observe itself, and this is where the real beginning can occur.

4. Once you have observed the twin selves (speaker and listener), it becomes possible to further realize that the listener is actually the higher self, and that when shifting to that higher awareness, (coming to "Awareness" rather than simply existing at the lowest common denominator of mechanical progression through life), you begin to experience for the first time the place of silent knowing. From there, once you learn how to shift to the place of higher awareness at will, the internal dialogue ceases to be a problem.

This is a technique that will yield very rapid results - not to entirely STOP the internal dialogue, but to give you direct awareness and experience of the twin-mind phenomenon, and as a result of that awareness, to consciously shift your attention to the infinitely more Aware higher self by choice. And, like any serious spiritual work, this is not a technique that will be mastered in a single sitting, though I've found that many actually do have a real "Eureka!" experience just by virtue of being able to experience "observer" and "observed" simultaneously.

The trick of this technique is that it does not rely on force or any direct attempts to silence the internal dialogue. It only requires the commitment to do it, and the gentle but ruthless task of observing oneself without judgment or fear.

Kristopher Kelley

Tips For Starting The Wim Hof Method

Here is a list of five pointers or tips for starting the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona and figured I’d post them here on my blog, as they will assist you during the process of beginning the WHM (Wim Hof Method.) If you think about it, you can use these pointers for just about anything and everything in your daily life if you put your mind to it! Give these a try and see how they work for you. 

Avoiding 

Whatever you avoid, like taking cold showers, meditation or performing breathing exercises, somebody or something else has to pick up. Emotions are energy in motion. If you don't experience them, then the energy either goes into your body and is stored there or it goes out into the world. Why would you make others experience what you, yourself, are avoiding? Avoided and unresolved issues are stored in the subconscious (and the physical body, IMHO) and we have to tackle these issues directly if we want resolution. I can assist you through the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona if you would like me to. Just contact me on this page and I will get back to you as soon as I can. 

Stagnation

When energy is blocked or can't move, it stagnates. In your body, the restricted energy goes into adjacent muscles and organs and causes illness. In your personality, restricted energy flows into the patterns that you are least aware of and they run. In groups, restricted energy flows into the people whose attention is weakest and they are flooded. When energy stagnates, change and eliminate the configuration or pay the consequences. Once again, I can assist your mind and body with the process of energy stagnation and the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona. Using the WHM, I can work together with you to clear out all your personal history and stagnation. 

Momentum

Consistently performing the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona builds momentum. Momentum doesn't just go away. It has to go somewhere. When attention is not present, momentum flows into old patterns and powers them. The more you practice the WHM and the longer you practice, the more important attention becomes. There are no vacations when working out unresolved issues. This is where a bit of motivation comes in on my part in assisting you. We must keep going…FURTHER! 

Rhythm

Respect the rhythms and ‘feelings’ of the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona. Wim is always speaking about ‘following your feelings.’ This is important with the WHM as it may be dangerous if you don’t pay attention or follow the rhythm. When you are tense and on edge in your Wim Hof Method work, just chill, relax and rest. When you are relaxed and open, push deep into the training you are working on, push deep into your own cells of your body. Glass doesn't bend; it breaks. Water doesn't move until you open a channel. Once again, doing the work of the Wim Hof Method ‘opens the channels’ within your mind and physical body…if you just practice how to relax, and then perform WHM exercises and such. 

Old ways (Habits)

Once you see through a pattern using the Wim Hof Method, once you see what you've been doing, thinking, behaving, you can't go back. Ignorance may have been bliss, but you aren't there anymore. This means you can’t use your old excuses anymore, or use your old patterns and behaviors as a crutch anymore. Thus, you need to be prepared to live your (new) life without the old thoughts, actions and beliefs. This will take some practice, but if you complete at least one full week, but no more than a month of the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona, this should clear out most of the old ways, habits and beliefs. If not…well, that’s what the training is for! If not, I’m here to assist as well, both mentally (motivation!) and physically, with tips on the training. 

Hopefully this short blog post will entice you to begin or to continue on with the Wim Hof Method in Prescott Arizona. It’s a marvelous mind-body healing technique, yet it’s not just theory. You actually have to DO it! If you don’t know where to begin, contact me. This information is provided below.

Kristopher Kelley 

warrior.of.lite@gmail.com

(928) 273-8666

The Invitation

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your hearts longing. 

It doesn't interest me how old you are, I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive. 

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your sorrow, have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. 

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine and your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. 

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic or to remember the limitations of being human. 

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself, if you can bear accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. 

I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore to be trustworthy. I want to know if you can see beauty even when it’s not pretty everyday, and if you can source your life from its presence. 

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver of the full moon...YES! 

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done for the children. 

It doesn't interest me who you are or how you came to be here. I want to know if you can stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back. 

It doesn't interest me what or where or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. 

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in empty moments.

Oriahe Mountain Dreamer

Death Is An Advisor - Memento Mori

"Perhaps the whole root of our trouble, the human trouble, is that we will sacrifice all the beauty of our lives, will imprison ourselves in totems, taboos, crosses, blood sacrifices, steeples, mosques, races, armies, flags, nations, in order to deny the fact of death, which is the only fact we have." ~ James Baldwin

Death is the key to life. Death defines life, gives it shape and meaning and context. Without a clear and honest relationship with our mortality, we live in a state of endless spiritual sprawl, a soupy gray fog that creates that hellish illusion of life stretching endlessly in all directions.

We’ve homogenized our lives by hiding the parts we’re afraid of, and in so doing, we’ve removed all sense of urgency from life. We have taken death out of life and that allows us to live unconsciously. Death never left, of course, we’ve just turned away from it, pretended it wasn’t there. If we wish to awaken - and that’s a mighty big if - then we must welcome death back into our lives. Death is our own personal Zen Master, our source of power, our path to lucidity, but we have to stop running from it in a blind panic.

We need only stop and turn around and there it is, inches away, staring at us with unblinking gaze, finger poised, every second of our lives. That finger is the one true thing in the dream-state, and it will, for a fact, come down.

Death-awareness is the universal spiritual practice. What we have sought in books and magazines, in teachers and teachings, in ancient cultures and foreign lands, has been breathing down our neck the entire time. It’s not just another mood-making spiritual technique that you dabble with for a few weeks and blame yourself when it doesn’t deliver. Death always delivers. Death is your only true friend, the only friend that will never abandon you and that no one can take away. It slices through every lie, ridicules every belief, mocks every vanity and reduces ego to absurdity. He’s sitting with you right now. If you want to know something, ask him. Death doesn’t lie.

The inverse of death-awareness is equally important.  Learn to practice death-denial awareness.  Anytime you find yourself sitting on the couch watching TV, shopping in the mall, or trying to find amusement in some pointless book or idle pastime, remind yourself that this is exactly the habit you want to break.  Try to catch yourself in all the situations throughout the day when you are not awake, not aware, going through the motions of your life in a virtually somnambulistic state.  Remind yourself constantly:  This moment, right now, I am in the sleep-state.  This is the mindlessness I’m addicted to like a drug.  I am an opium addict living in an opium dream.  This is the coma; this slow oozing of my life down the drain.  Right now, my life is slipping away.  

Another powerful thing about the practice and cultivation of death-awareness is that it provides an accurate barometer of your own spiritual sincerity, though you may not want one.  Anyone can go sour on mainstream religion and adopt a less orthodox belief system to replace it, but how many people are really sincere in their spiritual aspirations?  

Probably everyone thinks they are, but are YOU really?  Are you willing to go wherever this leads?  To do whatever it takes?  Thousands talk the talk for one who walks the walk.  The practice of death-awareness separates the walkers from the talkers.  We can use this as a spiritual self-diagnostic to determine, once and for all, if spirituality is something we’re serious about or if we’re just tourists.  Most are just tourists, but which of us are sincere and which are dabblers?  

If you want to answer this question for yourself, here’s your chance.  Your relationship to your own mortality tells the tale.  Everyone is either facing toward it or turned away from it, it’s that simple.  Toward or away.  If you can’t face the most fundamental fact of your own existence, what can you face?  This is ground floor, entry-level awakening.  It doesn’t get any closer or simpler than this.  

If, based on the posts in this thread, your life does not undergo major restructuring over the next few months, then you have your answer; you’re a tourist with no real desire or intent to wake up.  What you do with that knowledge is up to you.  Maybe you don’t want to know the answer to this question, but if you don’t want to know, then you know. 

Kristopher 

Intuition and Your Spiritual Guidance System

INTUITION AND YOUR SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE SYSTEM

QUESTION: 

“To be honest, I don’t care about enlightenment or god, but I want to live the best life I can and a part of that is to try to find a way to live with sickness, death, violence and all those bad things I can’t control. There are so many theories, belief systems and ideas floating around so where to turn? Where to start? And some spiritual teachers say there is nothing to do which may be true but is not helpful at all.

So my questions is, where can I find my GPS-system to guide me? Where do I look for direction? It can’t be a book or an external authority. My best answer so far is intuition. My own feeling (not really an ordinary emotion like fear or anger, etc.,etc.,) of what is the next right step.”

ANSWER:

The “best life” you can live is the one you are already living.

There is no “better” or “best” version out there. THIS is all there is.

That your current experience of life is filled with confusion (competing theories, ideas and belief systems) and suffering (sickness, death and violence) does not mean that the quality of your life is poor.

A “good life” is not one that is free of pain and confusion. That is an EASY life.

It sounds to me like you are conflating a good life with an easy life.

Why should life be easy?

I can give you many strategies for living an easy life. I can tell you numerous ways by which you can quite easily live with the sickness, death and violence in the world. Or I can show you ways to completely resolve the conflict between the various beliefs and theories out there.

In fact, as we speak, millions of people across the world are using these strategies right now – and quite effectively. Ignorance, apathy, magical thinking, spiritual bypassing – these are tried and tested techniques for living with suffering. And as for resolving the conflicts between various beliefs and theories – its easy, just pick one belief system and brainwash yourself thoroughly.

But a “good life” is rarely ever an easy one. Because it is one that refuses to accept things at face value - to turn away from doubts, discrepancies and inconsistencies. In fact, it is oriented towards delving deeper in an effort to get to the marrow of experience. To savor living.

Encountering doubt, conflict and irreconcilable differences not only become inevitable – they become NECESSARY. If you do not feel uncomfortable with the suffering in the world it means you are either ignorant or are numbed. Suffering should feel uncomfortable – just like the smell of shit should stink.

Suffering stinks and I hope you never lose your sense of smell for it.

Desensitization is a coping mechanism that people use to deal with the feeling of becoming overwhelmed by the sensory inputs in their environment. Life is too intense for them and so they learn to “dim” it in order to engage with it.

But a dimmed existence isn’t what you are looking for, is it? Rather it’s the opposite. Its one in which you are able to engage with life in its full intensity.

A life fully lived.

Such a life requires us NOT to desensitize, but to do the opposite – to become increasingly sensitive and intimate with it. We begin to feel things more intensely – sensations, emotions, thoughts – even conflict, confusion and suffering.

However, sensitivity and tolerance tend to be inversely proportional. So, those who have a high immunity or tolerance to their own suffering (or that of others) also tend to have less of an awareness or sensitivity towards that suffering. Whereas, people who are sensitive towards that suffering also feel the negative impacts of that suffering more acutely.

Seekers tend to be of the more sensitive kind. They often begin seeking because they have felt something about their own existence acutely enough to be motivated to find out more. Yet, they also tend to feel the impacts of suffering more acutely for the very same reason.

Therefore, seekers are driven by dual motivations – to discover truth AND to alleviate pain.

The problem is that these two goals exist at cross-purposes. I often say to people: “the truth isn’t going to feel good.”

And so, there is this fundamental conflict at the heart of every seeker. Two competing motivations struggling for dominance. For the majority, the desire to relieve suffering wins out over the desire for truth. This is why you see so many spiritual paths presenting “liberation from suffering” as their highest offering.

Non-duality, in particular, attempts to package its offering as a 2-for-1 deal – offering both truth and peace within the same solution. Its strategy is to simply get rid of the “separate self” eliminating the very root of suffering, thereby revealing the truth of reality.

But a self can no more eliminate itself than a knife can cut itself or a single hand can clap. And so, the REAL effect of non-dual teachings is one of total desensitization. Where the self, rather than being eliminated, becomes utterly sedated. And the resulting experience of life – while perhaps reduced in conflict and suffering, is also a greatly dulled experience bearing little resemblance to truth.

As I’ve already said, there are many ways to live with confusion and suffering – and absolute self-denial is one of them.

So, before I answer your second question, you need to ask yourself:

“What is it that I truly want? Truth or peace?” And I want you to work on the assumption that only one of them is possible. That you can’t have your cake and eat it too.

In other words, truth may not be peaceful. And peace may not be truthful.

Which is it that you choose?

If your choice is peace, above all else, then you do not need my input. There are literally hundreds of teachers, writers and gurus out there (many of whom you are already aware of) who will do a much better job than I ever can of showing you a technique to achieve greater peace of mind.

However, if your choice is truth – then you have to be willing to forfeit “peace” as an expected outcome. That is not to say peace is forever going to be withheld from you. You may very well feel moments of great peace – but these may not endure. Or you may feel no peace at all. The important factor here is that peace, if it occurs at all, will be just a by-product – a side-effect that cannot be predicted and will never be the primary focus.

Is that what you want?

If that is the case – then your initial query of “finding a way to live with suffering” becomes a moot point of consideration. You will either figure it out or you won’t.

This brings us to the next point that you brought up about the “internal GPS system”. Most people are simply guided by pain-pleasure responses. And so, they orient themselves via external markers that elicit such responses. Driven by a desire to alleviate pain and to find peace/comfort – they pursue those objects, people and experiences that bring them a sense of ease, security and comfort.

But if those are NOT the primary factors that you want your life to be guided then the question becomes – what is?

If pain and pleasure are the dual coordinates used by those who are oriented by a need for peace – then what are the coordinates used by those guided by a desire for truth?

What is that faculty within us that orients us towards these new coordinates?

You hit upon it when you mentioned the faculty of intuition. You called it “not really an ordinary emotion” – and you are right, it isn’t.

But what is intuition exactly?

The simplest way I can define it is – intuition is our compass for aligning with life. In other words, it is not so much a sense of what is the “right thing for me to do” – it is more the sense of “what does this circumstance (life) require of me”?

The reason intuition is often so under-developed in people, is because it is actually very hard to follow through on it for three reasons:

-  Intuition isn’t always logical (makes rational sense)

-  Intuition doesn’t always reduce suffering

-  Intuition does not earn the support/validation of other people

If you reflect on it – these are three factors on the basis of which most people make decisions in life. Does it make sense? Does it make me feel good? Do other people validate and support me?

But it is often the case that intuition does none of the above. It may make little sense from a practical or rational standpoint. It can cause more anxiety and stress, often because it makes such little sense. AND few around us seem to understand or support it.

Like any muscle in the body or faculty in the brain, the less you use something (and by “use” I mean you put it to the test in real world scenarios) the less that faculty is allowed to develop.

And so, the only way to actually DEVELOP intuition – is to take a leap of faith and learn to follow through on it. Over and over again. And sometimes, things will pan out for you. Other times they won’t. But fear of pain and failure cannot be obstacles if your real motivation is truth. To hone your intuition (the only truth detector you have) you have to be willing to allow yourself to be guided by it and to learn from all experiences that result – positive and negative.

The reason I can tell you this, is that after two decades of following my intuition – I now trust it far above any other faculty of intelligence I possess, including reason. Because my reason (though I highly value it) is limited to only those variables and factors in my environment that I can “see” and “make sense of”. Whereas my intuition is tuned into the totality – both seen and unseen, the sensible and the absurd, the known and the mystery.

And whereas in the past I would have struggled to follow through on my intuitions – now I do so more effortlessly. As a result, what my faculty of reason qualifies as “right” or “wrong” – or what my survival instinct projects as “good” or “bad” – do not have the ultimate power to dictate my choices and actions. I don’t ignore these faculties by any means – but the ultimate power lies with my intuition. And it may be that my intuition leads me down a path that aligns with my reason and my survival instinct. Or it may lead me on a path that completely negates them.

Yet, there is no longer ever a case in which I act in a manner that directly contradicts my intuition in favor of logic or survival.

Now, there are certain caveats to what I’ve talked about here that should not be ignored.

Precisely because intuition can be such a powerful guidance system – there is a tendency for people with an underdeveloped intuition to overestimate it.

Because, how do you know you are not just following your own egotistical motivations parading as “intuition”?

That’s another trap people in New Age circles often fall into. Their “spiritualized egos” tend to rationalize every selfish whim or fancy as “intuition” – whereas in reality they are still very much operating from the pain-pleasure format that everyone else is on.

So, here are some of the features of intuition that may help you clarify where the motivation is emerging from:

Intuition is never ego-based. It is not designed to make a person’s ego feel enhanced in any way. So, if a decision or choice is making you “feel good”, “feel happy” or inflated in some way– this may not be based in intuition. An intuitive decision has more complex impacts than that. It is often a sobering experience – it can fill us with doubt and make us feel “smaller”/ humbled in comparison to the life circumstance we find ourselves in. An intuitive choice rarely makes us feel “safe” but rather it accentuates the uncertainty of the circumstance.

This is why intuition requires “faith” to follow through on. Not the kind of intellectual faith that belief systems require. But a faith in life itself. Intuition doesn’t promise a pleasurable outcome for you. In fact, it may (at least temporarily) even lead to great discomfort, anxiety and fear. So again, the feel-good factor may be altogether missing from the equation.

Intuition will almost inevitably be accompanied by feelings of doubt – often overwhelmingly so. It is rarely ever clear cut. It is not always rational. It can even seem morally ambiguous. In fact, when we follow through on it, it is rarely with a sense of certainty or confidence that we do.

One of the tell-tale signs of intuition is that it almost never manifests as an internal dialogue. It does not present an argument. It does not attempt to convince. It barely ever says anything at all. At most it may appear as a single statement, articulated out of the blue and gone before it is fully registered. More commonly it manifests as a deep-seated feeling of intention or sense of inevitability which can easily be drowned out by the noise of the thinking mind.

Intuition is not the voice of the thinking mind.

If you are thinking, it’s not intuition. It may be your mind attempting to rationalize an intuitive feeling – either in support of or against it. But it is not the intuition itself. That arises from a much deeper place.

The way to tune into intuition is through awareness. Sensitivity. Intimacy.

The very qualities that also make you vulnerable to pain and suffering.

This requires courage.

Courage because you are vulnerable. Courage because your conditioned mind cannot understand it. Courage because it feels uncomfortable and uncertain. And courage because no one in the world can validate it for you.

Not a parent. Not a friend. Not a teacher. Not a leader. Not a guru. Not even your own rational mind.

Life alone can provide you that validation via a sense of alignment with its own movement. And that alignment is experienced not as a feeling of pleasure, nor as a sense of intellectual “rightness” – but rather as a sense of underlying perfection, of wholeness – an overwhelming feeling that “all is well and as it should be”.

Nothing is missing. Nothing is amiss. Even in the midst of great suffering or hardship.

Free flowing spontaneity. Of thought. Of speech. Of action.

"Witness the disappearance of thought. This directive will stop the mind. Thought will cease. The witness is nothing but a descriptive thought arising that 'I am seeing'. The actuality is simply 'seeing is happening'. There is no 'I' that sees. SEEING that simple fact is enough. It may appear 'for the mind' as a small opening, a glimpse of pure open cognition happening. It is not a small opening, it is actually the vastness of presence-awareness, which has no size, small or large. It has no dimensions at all. The 3 Dimensional world appears in THAT and is THAT. Everything appears in the SEEING. The mind believes in a point of view and adds a story of 'me' the seer. It is just words appearing. Thoughts appear and disappear, yet they have no substance whatsoever. See that. Know that." Gilbert Schultz

Kristopher 

Surrender

Usually, when we think of a ‘warrior,’ someone drawing a line in the sand, making their last stand on earth, we think they are committing themselves to an all-or-nothing battle: Here and now, on this spot, live or die. That's the kind of ultimatum many often describe. They make it sound like a fight, like put up yer dukes...but it's really not.

It's the end of fighting, the end of a lifelong struggle.

Drawing this line doesn't mean battle stations, red alert, DEFCOM one and all that. It’s not that kind of battle. It means we have to lower our shields, not raise them. That's how easily and effectively we are undone, and it's because the enemy is within, running the show, redeploying all of our mental and emotional resources against us.

Instead of adopting a warlike posture, we must, counter-intuitively, lower our shields and defenses. This seems confusing until we understand that we are both the protagonist and the antagonist in this conflict, both attacker and defender.

This is the paradoxical nature of the struggle. We can't win by fighting. The very 'thing' that fights, that resists, is the 'thing' we seek to overthrow. Only by vanquishing self-importance can we prevail.

Only in surrender can we find victory. This is the part so few get, and fewer get beyond.

This is the part where everything starts sounding all sagely or Zen like, but that can't be helped. If you want to say that all religions and spiritual teachings share a core truth, it can only be this: Surrender is victory.

Yet, this isn’t the end.

It’s only the beginning.

Once we surrender, The Real Work begins.

Kristopher

Catching A Cold

This post is a little different from the rest, but feel it's needed here. This post ties in with impeccability and many other teachings of Wim Hof and others. This post references clients, but it is for all people in general. 

I often hear clients comment that they've 'caught a cold.' Really? As Tohei Sensei is famous for saying, "Why catch a cold? I throw them away!" BTW, I've not 'been sick' in over seven years and have never had the flu. I don't have a super-immune system, I have just focused on abundance of health, not dis-ease.

When, through insecurity (fear) and a feeling that there 'isn't enough,' we try to hold onto or cling to what we have, we begin to cut off this wonderful flow of energy. In hanging onto what we have, we fail to keep the energy moving and we don't make space for new energy to come to us.

People get sick because they 'believe' on an inner level that illness is an appropriate or inevitable response to some situation or circumstance, because it in some way seems to solve a problem for them or get them something that they need, or as a desperate solution to some unresolved and unbearable inner conflict.

If we are suffering physically in some way, it is a message that there is something to be looked at within our consciousness, something to be recognized, acknowledged, and changed.

This, above, is what I spend time on with clients using EFT Tapping, the WHM, inner silence, recapitulation and many other techniques. Seems to work like a charm!

Kristopher

Responsibility And Realization

I often hear people express a desire for deeper understanding. Why is it that some people seem to have understanding, and some don't seem to have so much? It might seem unfair. But you know, in daily life, we have a kind of proving ground for realization. Or we could say, a proving ground for the responsibility of realization.  

Many people in the world don't have enough food to eat. But in America we are so fortunate that we end up worrying about whether it's organic or not, or whether it is ‘cage free’ or not. But someone in Afghanistan would take it any way they could get it! This means they are grateful for the privilege of food. They are not snooty about it at all.  This is something that is important for us to keep in mind, even though we have plenty.  

In the same way some people have work, and some don't, especially over the past several years. The people that were around during the Depression (like my parents) in this country know that there are times when nobody has work. Or very few people have work. I mean it is not just the money, but work is a very valuable commodity. Work and love: the most wonderful things to have in your life. And yet, at times there are things that are challenging or difficult in our work. At least, as I observe it in my world, there are often people who seem to think that things are just not going the way they would like. Therefore, they are not grateful for the work and end up losing the opportunity. They don't see it as a privilege. They are so used to there being plenty to go around. It has no rare quality for them. And so, they throw it away unthinkingly.  

Clearly, it is the same way with relationships. If you do not appreciate the relationship you have, you soon will lose it. I am not talking about just spousal relationships here, but any kind of relationship.  

There are many small things that go with maintaining your daily life. And there are opportunities for each one of us. And often these opportunities are just out there and someone will pluck one and take it as their own, and own it, and do it. The cubic centimeter of chance, as Carlos Castaneda described it. This is something that is an opportunity for you to be grateful for. But the down side of this situation that we all find ourselves in is when we are not grateful for it, and don't see that it is a privilege, a privilege to have this opportunity. Then it is taken from us, and we don't get more.  

This is true in relationships and it is true in work. And these areas are just proving grounds. This is nothing yet. We are, in this, not even into the meat of it yet. These are just introductory. So, if you cannot handle the heat in regular everyday living, if you cannot be grateful and live your life for the privilege that it is, then you will never be given any deep level of realization, because the responsibility is a thousand-fold.  

You know, it might seem like, "Oh boy I would like to have bliss consciousness, some kind of rapturous realization that I could carry around with me all the time". But it's not like that at all. I mean it is a tremendous responsibility. Every little iota, and speaking from my own experience, every little iota that is given, it is made clear that there is a responsibility that goes with it. And if you don't see it as a privilege in the deepest part of your heart and are grateful for it and honor it, then indeed it will be taken from you, sooner or later. And you certainly won't be given any more. You won't be moving on, at least not until that issue is relived and appreciated for what it was.  

So, if you find yourself in your life, not moving ahead in financial, physical and emotional realization, then of course the same thing has to be true on a deeper, more spiritual level.  

I hope that this doesn't seem vague in some way. Because it seems very clear to me. Of course, we all make mistakes. We all fall down. We all forget things. We all forget to be grateful. It happens to me all the time. But, constantly remembering what I am writing about at this moment, bringing that back to your consciousness over and over again during the day, then it doesn't matter that you make mistakes.  

Then you will recover. Then you don't become bankrupt like the USA will soon be if someone doesn't take some action. If a company or a country becomes bankrupt, it already made the same mistake of forgetting to be grateful over and over, until finally all the money is gone. It doesn't happen with one fell swoop; never from a single event. You fall down once you get up again. I mean the way you progress is by making a mistake and learning from that, so of course that is not the end of things. Making a mistake means that you forgot to see this as a privilege. You forgot that you had been given a gift. Whatever you are engaged in that is a gift to you to be grateful for, and for you to honor, no matter how difficult. And if you do, then you will see things that you could never have seen in any other way. And you cannot tell others about them, actually. Because the only way you can see them is to get through that fire of difficulty to the other side. And it is that struggle that produces the substance, or character trait that we know of as maturity.  

These are just things that have sort of been washing over me lately, and naturally when that happens to me, then you get to hear about them too. I hope that you will think about this. I know if you think about it right now you can see how it played a part in your life this very day, today. Because this, in fact, is all that happens every day.

Curtis Sensei Lecture via Kristopher Kelley

The Gap

Here is another 'motivational' posts from Curtis Sensei. Again, as I've stated several times, I post these because they assist me; they motivate me; they get me through the tough times...Like when I'm in that cold ass shower performing the Wim Hof Method. Hey, when I'm face to face with the cold, I need all the motivation I can get! 

One of these days I'll get posting more in regards to how my Wim Hof Method In Prescott Arizona practice is going, but for now, just keep reading the existing posts. Now, listed below, is Curtis Sensei's post. 

When I look in the mirror, if I stay and look long enough, I will notice that my image shifts. But actually, the image is not shifting. It is my mind that is shifting. It is very difficult for me to focus or concentrate without my mind jumping from here to there.  

I look in the mirror universe or beautiful crystal ball of the universe and I polish myself.  

I pierce the mirror that reflects nothing. 

We say mirror universe, traditionally that mirror is the mirror that only has a mirror in front of itself. There is no object in the mirror. When we look in this mirror, this mirror is our mind. It is the essence of what is. As long as there is an object in that mirror then this is something to be sought after or feared. When this mirror is pure, when we see clearly then we say there is no image in the mirror. This is a pure mirror universe, not showing anything. 

With a sharp sword of my Will, I pierce to the pure mirror universe so that I polish myself.  

We hear about awakening, freedom from suffering. Where is that? In our struggle aren't we struggling for that freedom? In our pain aren't we disappointed and resistant to the lack of this fear? And in our fear aren't we afraid because we won't get to have this illusive freedom?  

Happiness, in other words. Satisfaction. Everybody wants that. We look for consciousness or mind. Where is this consciousness? All that fear and struggling and gathering. Hanging and clinging to and pushing away is all inside this mind. The mind is this condition that we have right here. We are searching for that which is just this. How silly. 

Suddenly, to experience being here, which of course is a fearless and pain-free and struggle-free condition. Sounds great. When I realized there was nothing there, I realized there was nothing to defend. What is there to be afraid of? 

Struggle against struggle. This fearful running from fear, which I was talking about. The pain is caused by a struggle to find something that we already have. This turns out to be foolishness to require this.  

If one practice’s meditation then we know that our mind tends to jump all over the place. Every time the mind shifts, we must begin again. So that's why, when we are practicing meditation or stopping the internal dialogue, it takes some time, some practice, before we can concentrate through a period of time where there isn't some gap, or hiccup, created by this mind shifting.  

Let's just look at this business of slack, or gap, or space between when someone ask you to do something and you do it. What is that gap made of? Well, it is made of you wanting to be the right one; it's made of a person's wanting to do a good job.  

It is a matter of learning to calm your mind. If you can calm your breath, then you can calm your mind. If you can calm your mind, you can calm your environment.  

Every time I ask folks, "If you have a choice between a positive life and a negative life, what do you choose?” I have never heard anyone say that they would choose negative! Is anyone here going to say they choose negative? Of course not.  

But in our daily life we do choose negative sometimes. So, this is another example of a gap here, right? This is a contradiction. In other words, is anyone here free of suffering? No. And we suffer because, maybe without knowing it, we choose negative. We want to choose positive, but our "choices" are not actually choices at all, but conditioned responses coming out from our history, and perhaps they may lead to a negative result. And when we see the negative result, we say, "But I don't like this. I wanted positive". Then always the answer is to review our choices and next time to overcome our conditioning to make the ones that lead to positive.  

This is the value of what we call a self-realized life.  

If we want to have a clear path to what we are doing, or any aspect of our evolving of our consciousness training, let alone in daily life, then we have to do the practice that develops us in that direction. If we want to go north, then we must head north, not south.  

What practices are you developing that lead in the right direction?

Curtis Sensei via Lectures 

Mind-Body Coordination

After bowing, I get up from seiza and look out the east window:  First sunlight shines a brilliant yellow across the room where I perform Ki-Breathing and Ki-Meditation.  I turn my gaze to the fountain I meditate and breathe in front of and I’m totally relaxed yet my awareness is crisp.  Breathing deeply and stretching upwards – a pleasure after Ki-breathing for several hours.  

My bare feet press on the cool ceramic tiles that line my kitchen and living room, and I walk across the house to take a look outside at the beautiful sunrise.  

As I approach the sliding glass door, I feel the chill on my feet and hear a blackbird chortle in the trees outside.  I enjoy these moments right after sitting; though I ‘m no longer meditating, I am not yet engaged in thought cascades about the day.  Awareness is calm and broad, refreshed from the Ki-breathing, as I reach the door.  

I reach to engage the latch.  As my finger draws the lever down, my awareness drops into the door’s mechanism, to just the spot where the latch hangs up before engaging.  Every morning when I push the latch, it balks at this point and I release it back upward and try again.  Click, hitch.  Click, hitch.  This morning, I notice my awareness is focused on the obstruction in the mechanism so completely that even when it works smoothly I don’t follow the lever into the down-locked position.  Each time I press the latch, I expect it will fail and consequently I immediately raise my finger to try again.  

I observe all this in the first moment of trying the latch.  A smile starts up the corners of my mouth.  

“Where is your mind?” I hear Sensei asking.  

“Why, it’s on the obstruction, the conflict point within the latch,” I answer.  “In fact, what’s mostly present is the anticipation of obstruction, the expectation of conflict.”  

And in that moment, my awareness draws into my center; while inhaling, I smile wider.  My finger touches the top of the latch, expectation released, awareness dropping, and I feel myself extend into the mechanism, all the way to the bottom of the channel.  I drop the latch... and in the stillness... I feel it hit the obstruction and hang.  

Laughing, I raise it again, and simply let it drop... hitch.  Then smoothly it glides through and lands into the locked position.  

As I leave my house, I remember how my mind focused on my grabbed wrist during aikido.  Seeing my awareness fix at the point of conflict.  My first inclination was to move at that grabbed spot, to counter, to force, to overcome, or to resist.  None of which embodied the spirit of aikido.  By focusing on the conflict, the grab, I was joining in and increasing the conflict.  Same issue with the latch.  

While the door’s latch had not grabbed me, the mechanism’s subtle obstruction had certainly captured my attention.  I was generating conflict with this mechanical snag and creating a rhythmic, kinesthetic expectation of conflict, all by myself.  What was really funny was that the latch did not care.  If I clashed or if I was masterfully centered, the latch either locked or jammed.  I simply got to see where I was at, each time I pressed.  

In aikido, there are usually two (or more) people involved, the grabber and the person grabbed. (Uke and Nage.)  A subtle relaxation and non-conflict movement from center by the grabbed, usually effects the one grabbing in interesting and unusual ways.  As they fall to the mat, they often wonder, “What happened?  Why did my grip, my attack dissolve so easily?”  By not focusing the mind into the conflict, not agreeing to clash, the conflict disappears:  it takes two to keep a conflict going.  This is not magic, but it is quite remarkable when one feels the awareness shift from conflict to non-dissension, along with the corresponding shift from reactive movement to creative movement.  

And it is not some “mamby-pamby” pacifist belief.  One authentically learns this discipline by throwing and being thrown to the mat many, many times, while paying powerfully close attention.  You can’t learn this by simply disengaging.  You have to enter into it fully and go through the innate conflict response until it is transcended for something much more nuanced and evolved.  

It takes a lot of practice to gain confidence in this mind-body shift, while at the same time learning to move smoothly and effectively.  

But let’s get back to the latch. 

While the latch could not drop me to the mat, it had metaphorically thrown me many times by trapping my awareness in the mechanism’s hitch for years, an indifferent circumstance I had used to pattern conflict.  Seeing how easily my mind led itself into conflict was humbling.  

But then, doesn’t a good teacher, with straight honesty, point out where our relative self is attached, where we are blind in our rich subjectivity?  

Or, maybe I should just oil the damn lock.

Author Unknown, but from a Ki Aikido Practitioner 

Polishing The Mirror And Grinding The Stone

This is a copied post from several years ago by an Aikido Sensei. I share these posts for motivation; mainly motivation for myself! Please tell me that you can see how this may improve your Wim Hof Method training! You can view how I am progressing with the WHM here: Wim Hof Method In Prescott Arizona. Enjoy and follow along as I muddle through a new training program :) 

Begin copied post. 

It is very difficult to understand the motives of all the people we come into contact with in our training. We may misjudge someone's character or desire. We may be so caught up in our own abilities we look down on those we do not know or understand.  Mostly this is done out of inexperience, not true malice.  

Let me relate this story to you: Several years ago, I had undergone severe surgery related to a chronic illness.  I had been put on a medicine called prednisone, which caused me to gain weight, 160 pounds to 210 pounds in two months. My body would not respond to normal commands. My mental state was severe depression. I was ready to give up life.  My students, some older than I with greater life experience, understood the danger.  They knew my sensei was teaching a seminar several hundred miles away.  They chipped in and got me a plane ticket. One stayed with me on the flight.  

They got me to the city and to the dojo. Someone helped me get dressed and onto the mat. I listened and watched as sensei taught. Several times young aikidoka came up and asked me to train. I politely refused. Several times I heard, "Why is he on the mat. If he doesn't want to train, he should get off the mat.  Who does this guy think he is?" By the end I could only smile at these remarks, because I knew why I was there and how much I had gained. I know there are others of you that have experienced similar situations. There have been many times over the years that this type of situation has occurred with me.  

Compassion, love and understanding will serve us well. Especially if we don't know what is going on around us. We may unknowingly, at any time, be witness to a life and death struggle.  A kind word, tolerance, a gentle touch and the strength of our compassion may be the aspects of martial valor that are the key to someone's victory.  

Some of us, given our physical condition, must train, metaphorically speaking, in the valley, or on the mountain. We are very seldom allowed the luxury of a plateau. When in the valley we seek to polish the mirror, and when on the mountain we grind the stone. In the valley we may lack the physical attributes necessary for vigorous training as defined by the "normal" martial artist. When we are in the valley, we are at a physical low point. At this time, we polish the mirror of our inner self. A teacher being aware of the situation may structure the class so as to give necessary training to all students.  

For instance, much detail may be given to the attack so it is as physically correct as we are capable of doing. Good body posture and extension of energy and a solid foundation with a firm center are some of the things we are looking for, in our self, and those people assisting us in the learning process. The same thing applies to the technique being studied. A good deal of emphasis is placed on correctness and going only as fast as correctness, and physical ability, will allow. By performing attack and defense in this manner we can learn the proper technique. We can begin to polish the mirror of Aikido within our self. We work on the exactness of the technique until the realness of the technique is reflected in our heart and body, in our movement, and in the ability to harmonize with our partners.  

By polishing the mirror in such a way, we become a reflection of proper technique, both as uke and nage. By being a good reflection of exact application, we eliminate much of the danger involved with each technique. That is, we reflect the innate correctness of Aikido. I have often seen sensei teach technique in such a way, in regular class and at seminars. I have often heard the young lions growl at such unrealistic training. I have seen some of the old warriors light up at being given the opportunity to polish the mirror a little more. This type of training has seen some of us through many a valley. It helps develop and prepare the body, mind and spirit for the ascent back up the mountain.  

Back on the mountain we are now ready to begin the process of grinding the stone. Grinding away the rough edges of our ego that sits like a jagged stone at the center of our being, causing pain and discomfort to our life.  Grinding the stone means to work hard and fast with our mind fixed on the task at hand. We can grind the stone in relative safety, providing we have spent sufficient time in polishing the mirror. As uke and nage we work together grinding off the rough edges. I give myself to you, and you give yourself to me in total trust. I assist you in the grinding and polishing process. In turn, you assist me, and when we are finished, we are smoother, happier and better for the effort. We continue to practice polishing the mirror and grinding the stone until the mirror of our spirit is a perfect reflection of true self and the surface of the stone is as smooth as the mirror. We are in harmony with ourselves and our environment.  

So don't be upset if the techniques are hard and fast, or slow and exact. We should not be upset if we do not understand why techniques don't look like those we have become comfortable with. We should not be upset with other students whose motives we do not fully understand. But we should ask ourselves where does the true value lie in this training, because there is value in ALL training.  

This is my way of training and it has been a process of necessity with me.  It was a long time ago that sensei taught me to take advantage of the valleys. When we are physically unable to grind the stone, we must polish the mirror. We must work on those things spiritual and reflect proper and positive attitude. By doing this we will also be helping the physical side of our being grow. By polishing the mirror and working on those things spiritual we will find the physical growing stronger. As the physical side grows, we can grind the stone.  

Some people that have a great deal of physical prowess only grind the stone.  They forget to polish the mirror, or just don't see the value of it. Others only polish the mirror, and see no value in grinding the stone.  I say polish and grind for all your worth because you may lose the physical ability to grind, or the spiritual patience to polish.  

I once asked an Aikido Teacher (who I considered to be strictly a stone grinder) why he did not work with people less than physically correct.  His answer was that he was not a salvage worker. He took good people and made them better. I don't know when or why he changed but now his life's work is salvaging people who are outcasts of society, and some quite dangerous.  

If you have people come into your dojo or club who have some type of physical malady, please do not expect them to be less able than the other students. You may find that they do indeed have a good deal of strength and spirit. I have had students missing limbs, and students with various illnesses. They may be able to learn only a few techniques, but they understand the value of what they have learned. They can grasp the concept of polishing the mirror and grinding the stone, and they know when to do each.  

I have a friend who is an accomplished Karate teacher. He has an artificial ankle and steel rods where bone used to be in his leg. His knees are scarred from surgery. When I see him come to Aikido class and sit in seiza, I know he has paid a price much dearer than that paid by most on the mat. Wearing a white belt and humble soul he comes to polish the mirror. He, like many we find on the Aikido mat today, spent his younger life grinding the stone. I would caution the young lions who show little tolerance for those who train differently. You may have a warrior standing before you.  Compassion, love and understanding will serve you well.  

O’ Sensei discovered Aikido for all of us, not just those of us who are physically correct.

Unknown Author, although I do recall when I copied this, that the author above was a medium ranking Sensei in Ki Aikido. 

The One

"Of every one hundred men, Ten shouldn't even be there, 

Eighty are nothing but targets, Nine are real fighters...

We are lucky to have them...They make the battle.

Ah, but the One, One of them is a Warrior...

and He will bring the others back."

In every community in every part of the world, in every gathering of people, whether it be business, social, political, spiritual, or artistic in some way, including in a theatre when watching a play or listening to a concert, or even if you are just informally sitting at a party, there is always someone who is the "one".

When I was a younger man, I had a friend who, much to my dismay, always seemed to be the "one". He was always the boss. He was always the one that made the decisions within our group of friends, and particularly in relation to me. And I was extremely envious of this. I couldn't figure out how this could be. It seemed so unfair, and I just didn't understand. Because, to my way of seeing, I was apparently not the one and he was, and this was very difficult and painful for me. And as I was envious of him in this way, of course I was resentful as well, that he had this power over me, and I was angry. I didn't so much get angry overtly, because I was ashamed of this. I wanted to hide this anger from him. So it came out in various ways.

But only later in my life, when I began to focus more, and look more closely at this, did I realize that the reason I had so seriously missed the point, was that I was focusing in the wrong direction. I didn't realize that I was the one, too; that I could be the one, without making him not the one. My thought had been that he had taken the position of the one, and I could only think of how to get it away from him. I pondered, "How do I snatch that from him so that I can be the one? How can I wrest this position away from him?"

So I am simply reminding myself here of something that I already know; namely that in any situation there is always somebody who acts as the one. However, in a formal teaching situation, someone who is a teacher, a true teacher, is understanding what is the one, and in fact is representing the one, but instead of trying to lord it over everyone else, he or she is always wanting to give it away. A true teacher is only there to help you realize that you are already the one. Because s/he understands that this is so, without a doubt. And even though everybody has this condition of oneness a priori, still it is very rare that a person actually recognizes that he or she is the one. And while I say that in every situation there is someone who acts as the one, that doesn't necessarily mean that this one acts with complete self-knowledge. There is always one, but whether that one really sees the whole oneness issue, is up for discussion. They may not get the whole banana, but there is always someone that is standing out in this way, and everyone always knows this.

Has anyone ever been in a monastery? And for those of us that have been, what did we find when we got there?

There are all sorts of things we can do in our lives to avoid difficult and challenging situations. But no matter where we go, like a monastery, the difficulties seem to follow us. I was once in a monastery. I went to avoid the distractions and temptations of this world, which I was not handling too well. But when I got there, I realized that they were all sitting right next to me. All those things I took with me. They are always going to be there.

In other words it doesn't have anything to do with anyone else. It doesn't have anything to do with external conditions. It is not where you are, but what you are. It has to do with your state of being; your state of mind. And that is what I am trying to get to here; that no matter what is happening with this person who is annoying you, what makes the difference is not what is happening with him, and not what you do in reaction to this, but what is your state of mind. That dominates all. That is the "one".

Guest post by: Christopher Curtis Sensei

Ki Meditation - Chin Shin No Gyo

 Ki Meditation - Chin Shin No Gyo

PRINCIPLES FOR KI MEDITATION 

1. You maintain a posture of mastery. 

2. You have a sense of freedom. 

3. You create an atmosphere of harmony. 

4. You are vividly aware of the spirit of life in all things. 

5. Therefore you can feel the movement of Ki in the Universe. 

Ki meditation should be practiced in an upright sitting position; either on the knees (seiza), cross legged (lotus or agura), or in a chair. Any time of day or night is appropriate, however the quiet of late night or early morning is best. A place should be selected that is relatively private, and separated from where the busy activities of the daytime take place. 

Tohei Sensei calls Ki meditation "Ki no ishi ho" or "Ki method for strengthening the will-power". "Will Power" is the faculty or function of the mind that enables us to experience alert calmness, or attentive calmness. How this works is not always easy to discuss in words. We tend to think of "will-power" as a kind of inner force that we impose upon some aspect of our nature in order to attain a certain desired result. However, in meditation this way of thinking can lead to very unsatisfactory results. In meditation, the more we try to "do" something, to control, or to accomplish some result, the more we will fail. It is as if we have a large tub of water that is very agitated, with many small waves on the surface. This is very much like our mind. One would never think to calm the waves in the tub by trying to use the hands to hold the water in place. We would simply wait on the side until the waves calm down on their own. 

When we meditate, "will-power" is what is used to keep the hands out of the waves, and allow the inner self to wait patiently on the side while the waves of the mind gently, slowly begin to calm themselves down. In other words, meditation is a process that we “allow" to happen, not something that we "make" happen. 

For some of us, this "simplest" type of Ki meditation is the most difficult of all. Sometimes this "patiently waiting" for the waves of the mind to calm is frustrating. It is the nature of the mind to want to be doing something. It is very difficult for the mind to be calmly watching. Therefore, Tohei Sensei has developed a very effective method of Ki Meditation. It is practiced as follows: 

While sitting in the quiet place that you have selected, first imagine that you are collecting a sphere of Ki. Beginning at the outer most limits of the Universe, imagine the sphere of Ki becoming smaller and smaller by half, until it quickly centers into your One Point in the Lower Abdomen, and continues infinitely there. When it becomes impossible to imagine the infinitely decreasing sphere, as it disappears into your One Point, then let the image go, but continue to follow the feeling that this process has created. This "collecting" or "concentrating" or contracting" is called Shuchu ho. 

Then, after about 60 seconds, imagine the tiniest of spheres forming in the middle of your One Point, and gradually becoming bigger and bigger, each time by half, and continuing to expand infinitely. When it becomes impossible to imagine the huge sphere it has become, then let that image go, and continue following the feeling that is present. This is called Kakudai ho. 

Both Shuchu ho and Kakudai ho produce the same feeling within, and in fact are essentially the same thing, being looked at two different ways, like two sides to the same coin. The whole process of Shuchu ho/Kokudai ho, while keeping the mind occupied, has a very calming effect, and is an excellent practice for developing the feeling of relaxed meditation. 

Tohei Sensei has also developed a mudra, or hand position, that is very effective in allowing the Ki to focus. It is called Toitsu No In, and is as follows: 

Place the hands together in front your face at eye level. Then interlock the fingers, with the tips of the fingers pointing towards your face, and the small, third and second fingers of your right hand overlapping the same fingers on your left hand. Then close your hands, crossing your left thumb over your right, and touching your two first fingers together evenly, and pointing upward. This finger posture, or mudra, should be very firmly held, yet the hands should be relaxed. Once the position has been assumed as described above, gently lower the Toitsu No In to your lap, and let it rest there. This posture is a kind of "seal" of mind/body coordination, in that, while in this position, it is extremely difficult to not be coordinated. It promotes a feeling of calm meditation in itself, and so is a good posture to assume when practicing any form of meditation. 

Reminder: In order to accomplish anything in life, we must possess the following three characteristics: 

1) The Desire to do it. 

2) The Effort to do it. 

3) The Will Power to continue doing it. 

If any of these three are lacking, then we will necessarily fall short of our goal. It is sometimes helpful to consider that the joy and fulfilment of Life is contained within the process of accomplishing, not the result of, any great endeavor. 

In addition, this "process of accomplishing" can only be truly effective when aided by the following three-character attributes: 

1) Right practice (body).

2) Right attitude (feeling).

3) Right understanding (mind).

Consider these, and make them yours.

Curtis Sensei via Kristopher Kelley

Sai Kon Tan - Chinese Philosophy

The calmness which you find at rest is not true CALMNESS. Only the calmness which you find in action is genuine. 

Similarly, the peace of mind which you find in retirement is not true peace of mind. Only the peace of mind you find in the midst of struggle is true peace of mind. 

When we are in difficulty, everything around us has the potential of being our ally, only we fail to notice it. When things are going well everything around us has the potential of being our enemy, only we fail to see it. 

The mouth is the gate of the mind. If you are not careful, it will spill all your secrets. Intention is the feet of the mind. If not controlled it will carry you forthwith down the wrong path. 

If let alone, waves on the water naturally calm down. The mirror reflects clearly if there is no smoke. Similarly, there is no need to make our mind clear. All we need to do is remove the things which cloud it and make it dark. Then it is naturally pure. There is no need to force pleasure if we remove the cause of suffering. 

We naturally experience joy.

Time

Time is the inexplicable raw material of everything. With it, all is possible; without it, nothing. The supply of time is truly a daily miracle, an affair genuinely astonishing when one examines it. 

You wake up in the morning, and (lo!) your purse is magically filled with twenty-four hours of the unmanufactured tissue of the universe of your life! It is yours. It is the most precious of possessions ... No one can take it from you. It is unstealable. 

And no one receives either more or less than you receive. 

Moreover, you cannot draw on its future. Impossible to get into debt! You can only waste the passing moment. You cannot waste tomorrow; it is kept for you. You cannot waste the next hour; it is kept for you. You have to live on these twenty-four hours of daily time. 

Out of it you have to spin health, pleasure, money, content, respect, and the evolution of your immortal soul. Its right use, its most effective use, is a matter of the highest urgency and of the most thrilling actuality. All depends on that. 

Your happiness ... the elusive prize that you are all clutching for, my friends... depends on that. If one cannot arrange that an income of twenty-four hours a day shall exactly cover all proper items of expenditure, one does muddle one's whole life indefinitely. 

We shall never have any more time. We have, and we have always had, all the time there is. 

Arnold Bennett

The Invitation

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your hearts longing. 

It doesn't interest me how old you are, I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive. 

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your sorrow, have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. 

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine and your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. 

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic or to remember the limitations of being human. 

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself, if you can bear accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. 

I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore to be trustworthy. 

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it’s not pretty every day and if you can source your life from its presence. 

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver of the full moon...YES! 

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done for the children. 

It doesn't interest me who you are or how you came to be here. I want to know if you can stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back. 

It doesn't interest me what or where or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. 

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in empty moments.

Oriahe Mountain Dreamer

Ki Breathing - Ki No Kokyu Ho

Ki Breathing, as practiced in Ki Aikido, also known as, Shin Shin Toitsu Aikido, is the first 'breathing method' I've tried. This was many years ago, perhaps back as far as 1995. It's significantly different from the Wim Hof breathing method. I'm not going to go into all the similarities and differences; I'll just list the steps as outlined by Curtis Sensei. 

PRINCIPLES FOR KI BREATHING 

1. Exhale gradually, with purpose and control. 

2. Exhale with a distinct, but barely audible sound. 

3. At the end of the breath, Ki continues infinitely like a fading note. 

4. Inhale from the tip of the nose until the body is saturated with breath. 

5. After inhaling, calm the mind infinitely at the One Point. 

A Zen master once asked his student, "What is the most important thing in Life?" "Truth, Master, the youth replied, without hesitation. The Master grabbed the young man's head and plunged it into a tub of water, where he held it for several moments. As the Master allowed the student to emerge, gasping for Breath, it became perfectly clear what the most important thing in Life is! 

Of the five necessities of life; food, water, shelter, clothing, and air, the latter is the most immediately essential, and the most abundant. It is also the only one that is free. The human lungs can take in between 3000 and 4000 cubic centimeters of air with each breath, and yet most of us only utilize a small portion of that potential, taking in about 500 cubic centimeters, as we breathe in daily life. It is generally understood that a part of our body that is not used, begins to atrophy, and eventually becomes useless. 

The lungs are no exception to this rule. Performing Ki Breathing, or Controlled Breathing, is no more than taking the time and attention to breathe completely; to utilize the full capacity of our lungs. The human body possesses over 20 miles of blood vessels; arteries, veins, and capillaries. It takes approximately 20 seconds for the oxygen and/or carbon dioxide laden blood to complete one circuit of the body. During this brief round trip from lungs to cells and back to lungs again, all the oxygen that is the essential fuel of our energetic cell engines, and all of the carbon dioxide that is the toxic by-product of these tiny machines, flows in the blood stream. How much of this needed oxygen is available, and how much of the carbon dioxide waste is eliminated, depends entirely upon how much is present in the blood stream at any one time. It stands to reason that if we have available to us the ability to fully utilize this breathing system, it will most certainly benefit us to do just that, and as completely as possible. 

Breath is the key to life. This statement contains truth far beyond the obvious physical reality discussed above. Breathing can control the autonomic nervous system, the system that is responsible for enervating cardiac muscles and glandular tissues as well as governing our so-called "involuntary actions". Next time you become emotionally disturbed; pause to observe your breathing. You will find that, like your agitated emotional state, your breathing has also become shortened and erratic. When we see someone undergoing some difficulty, don't we always say, "Slow down, take a deep breath, and begin again."? Conversely, if, when we sense a moment of some emotional challenge coming, we are able to calmly continue to breathe deeply and easily, our autonomic nervous system will mirror this calmness, and those related systems within our bodies will be spared the damage of the avoided stress, not to mention avoiding perhaps some regrettably damaging words or actions. "Control yourself, before attempting to control others", begins with controlling your own breath, and being able to control your breath only comes through hours, days, weeks, months, years of practice. So, as Suzuki Sensei often says, "Breathe, Breathe, Breathe!” 

The following are the different ways we practice and use breathing in Aikido: 

1.Controlled Breathing or Whole Body Breathing. Sitting in an upright position, with the spine straight, close your eyes gently, take in a full breath of air, open your mouth wide, placing your tongue behind your lower front teeth, and silently making the sound of "Ha", calmly begin to exhale. For the beginner, this exhalation may be as short as ten seconds, but little by little, as you become more relaxed and calm, you will be able to exhale for 20 to 30 seconds at a time. 

While this exhalation is taking place, try imagining that your body is a hollow vessel, and is, ever so slowly being emptied, as with a straw, from the top of your head, to the tips of your toes. After all of your breath has been exhaled gently and calmly, incline your upper body very slightly forward. You will find that a last small amount of breath will be expelled. (Note: Never attempt to push the breath out, but simply allow the natural action of the breathing to complete itself). Still in the slightly forward leaning position, close your mouth, and very gently begin allowing the inhalation to begin. 

Imagine that the new breath enters on a path up the bridge of the nose, between your eyes, down your spine, and begins to fill your now empty vessel of a body from the tips of your toes to the top of your head. This inhalation process may be shorter in at first, but with experience, a slow, calm inhalation should take from 20 to 30 seconds. When you feel that your lungs are filled to capacity, allow your upper body to return to its former upright position. This last slight movement will allow the lungs to take in an additional small amount of air. Then begin this process over again, with another exhalation. 

2. Retention Breathing. It is one thing to be able to remain calm, with mind and body coordinated when sitting still, but quite another when in motion. One of Tohei Sensei's favorite ways of testing this is as follows: Sit calmly in seiza position. Inhale and exhale one complete cycle. Then inhale completely. Stand and walk forward for about 15 paces while holding the breath. Sit calmly and carefully in seiza position, and begin slowly to exhale. If you have been able to maintain calmness and mind/body coordination during this movement, then your exhalation will be very even and quiet. If, as you exhale, your breath is quick and rough, then you have not succeeded. You must practice Controlled Breathing more! 

3. Cadence Breathing. Cadence Breathing is performed while walking. If you are going on a long hike, or find yourself climbing a long set of stairs or incline, practice this exercise. Simply put, Cadence Breathing is regulating your inhalation and exhalation with your steps, to a count. The amount of steps per inhalation/exhalation is not so important, (it depends somewhat upon the amount of exertion required), but as the walk progresses, the count should remain constant. Ex: Breathe in as you count 1,2,3 steps; breathe out as you count 1,2,3,4 steps. 

Many people, while they walk, like to chat with another person. This is fine, but not while performing this exercise. You must be quiet, and focus on the coordination of the breathing, the steps, and the count. This way you will find that you can walk much further, and with much less effort, than before. 

4. Haku Breathing. Haku breathing is a very short, forceful exhalation, repeated several times. The Japanese verb "hakimasu" means "to throw out", or even "to throw up". So to perform haku breathing is to focus all of your mind and body, and throw everything into the exhalation. 

First, sit calmly in seiza posture. Open your mouth wide, and place your tongue behind your lower front teeth. Inhale fully, and while leaning slightly forward, throw your exhalation forward and out in one forceful blast. It is not necessary to make a particular sound with the voice box. The breath, passing rapidly through the throat region, will create a sound by itself. But it is imperative that you stay calm and relaxed in the midst of this great breath movement. Do not move your shoulders, your jaw or mouth area, or your head. Only maintain an erect posture, with mind and body coordinated, and as the breath comes out, lean forward slightly with the entire upper body. 

If you perform haku breath completely, a natural vacuum is created at the end of the exhalation, in the lungs. In this way, the lungs automatically refill with air. However if you hold back even slightly, the vacuum will not be created, and you must suck air into your lungs. If this happens, you will find it very difficult to repeat haku breath rapidly. Haku breathing should be practiced daily. 

All rapid or forceful movement originates in, and is controlled by, the breath. If we learn to use this breath in a calm, but strong and lightning fast manner, then we will be able to use our entire body in this way, when an emergency requires it. 

5. Kiai. "Kiai" is an expression of the breath, and is an example of the inner nature of martial arts training, (the outer factors being weapons and techniques). The word "kiai" is a compound of "ki" (universal energy) and "ai" (a contraction of the verb "awasu", meaning "to unite"). This combination denotes a condition in which two minds are united into one in such a manner that the stronger controls the weaker. In ancient Japan, the word "Ki" was often used in the sense of personal energy, spirit, or character, and therefore personality. A magnetic personality has always been able to call upon strong power of projection and suggestion. This kind of "personal power" as expressed through kiai can be used to prevent combat or to win without fighting. The uttering of kiai is a projection of audible breath, or voice, with Ki. It can be very loud, or quite soft. 

The secret to kiai is not to make a loud or forceful noise, but to extend Ki strongly before speaking, relax the whole body, especially the throat, and unify mind and body instantly. There are several different forms of kiai. From Zen: Katsu From Kendo: Ei > Yah < Toh = From Aikido: Iei (ee-yay-ee) There is also what's known as "silent kiai". This is performed by holding the breath, and extending Ki strongly from every part of the body. This kind of focused, powerful kiai can be used to save others from imminent danger, or to control those in an angry mood. 

There is an old Japanese story of a samurai walking through the woods. He was set upon by a pack of wolves, clearly threatening his life. Instead of exhibiting fear, he calmly continued on his way, his countenance so stable, aware and potentially explosive, that the animals were frozen in their tracks, and he was able to pass safely through their midst. This is an example of silent kiai. As in all aspects of Aikido, it is of primary importance that kiai be only used for good, and never used lightly.

Kristopher Kelley via Christopher Curtis Sensei